Gatekeeping

 re: Gatekeeping

I recently responded in a thread whose OP originally claimed that there's an awful lot of gatekeeping in the world of gay romance. A few people on the thread said that women shouldn't be allowed to write M/M romance.

In my first book, Wayward Guilt, I included a M/M love story between a gay man and a bisexual man. It's not a romance because the romance genre requires a happy ending. I write military fiction, and 5 of my named characters didn't survive to the end of the book. In my second book, Safe Now, 2 characters didn't survive to the end of the book. At least in that book, you can say they had it coming. In my romance, Don't Call Me Sugar, my MMC has various below-the-belt piercings and lots of tattoos. I've never dated someone with those. I don't have lots of tattoos. Should I have removed those elements from the story? In my new book, two paramedics are going to have a call with a body-piercing gone wrong... ahem. Should I cut that scene?

One of the commenters even went as far as saying that if we didn't personally experience something, we shouldn't write about it. I'm a researcher - something I quite enjoy about the writing process. There's no way I could have been an Army Ranger yet - gasp! - I wrote about it anyway. I conducted interviews and lucked out with some of the most wonderful people I could have ever met, who were quite generous with their time and knowledge.

Anyway - this is my response in that thread. I'd love your thoughts.

Wow - there's a lot to take in here - starting with Indie authors doing anything "for profit." Facetious comment aside...

Am I right in thinking that some of the above commenters believe that cisgendered straight women should never write about anyone in the LGBT community? Are you suggesting that we deliberately exclude them? I have family, friends, coworkers, etc, who are members of the LGBT community. Are you suggesting I should make sure my friends and family have absolutely no representation in my books despite being important people in my own life?

I'm a cis-gendered, heterosexual white woman. As I understand some of the comments above, I should never write about anyone who isn't exactly like me. Or I should never write about anything that I haven't personally experienced.

I write military fiction. The main characters in my first book are US Army Rangers who served from 2001-2014. Women weren't allowed to even try to become Army Rangers until 2014. I was 44 years old in 2014, so there's absolutely no way I could have ever written about what it's like to be an Army Ranger because there was absolutely no way I could have had any personal experience. Should I have scrapped my book?

As it stands, I interviewed 4 different Army Rangers about their experience, the types of missions they served, the training they received, etc. My main character is a US Army Ranger combat medic-turned paramedic, so I interviewed a US Army Ranger combat medic-turned paramedic.

I write about firefighters, so I've interviewed firefighters and even found a couple to fact-check what I've written.

I'm now writing a murder mystery set around a hockey team, so I've interviewed PR and Communications managers of an NHL franchise to learn who's responsible for what within hockey and arena operations, including a behind-the-scenes tour to see how things work inside that type of business. I don't pull stuff out of my backside. I do the research.

I'm working on an origin story of my town. I didn't live in the 1870s, so should I scrap that book project because I can't pull from my own personal experience?

I love fake dating tropes in romance, but I've never fake-dated anyone. Should I not be allowed to write that?

I write about Bulgarian characters in my story, but I'm an American. I write about people whose native language isn't English. Should I go back and change their nationalities?

And based on the comments above, there are those who think we just grab our one gay friend to read our books. And while those people may or may not be friends, it is never a bad thing to engage the services of a sensitivity reader. My book was military fiction, but I still asked other authors - typically gay, male authors - to read my work prior to publication to ensure I didn't inadvertently write based on a stereotype or a caricature of someone like them. I also had black characters in my books, so I asked black women to read my book as well. I'm not a gay man. I'm not a black woman. That's why I research, and that's why I ask people to review my work prior to publication.

In my first book, I included a M/M love story as a subplot. I also included characters who were a lesbian couple. I included immigrants and children of immigrants. In my second book, I had a victim of human trafficking. I've never been trafficked, though I live in a state that is one of the largest hubs for human trafficking. Should I pull my book off the shelves since I haven't personally been kidnapped, tortured, assaulted, threatened with no way out, etc? I'm a woman, so yes - I've experienced plenty of misogyny (some of which is apparent in this thread), assault, sexual harassment, etc. Does that qualify me for anything at all in your eyes?

As for LGBT characters, I will indeed include them in my books. I will not deliberately exclude them, and any suggestions that I do so are misguided and rather arrogant. And if you're not a woman, by your own logic, you should never include a single woman in your books.

If you're an indie author, I will support you - because you're an indie author and we should do what we can to support our fellow creatives. But we all know marketing sucks. And just because some authors have had success and because some authors who include LGBT characters in their books have had success is no reason to shoot them down.

I'm going to write what I want to write - even if that means I'm going to eventually publish a M/M romance I have in the works. Why? Because I'm an author. I'm a writer who writes the story I want to read. And if I don't know something, I research it. I don't intentionally culturally appropriate a damned thing, but I do give different people of different backgrounds a voice. I'm a writer. That's what we do.

And I'll keep doing that until I can no longer type the keys or speak into a microphone to put words on a page.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll go back to marketing. Ugh. So much work. 😛

Well? What do you think?

Happy reading!

 - Heather

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